19.Tamil heroes

I'm a Tamilian...so i just want to talk about Tamil movies...I'm a very big fan of Hindi movies (personal opinion!!!)..I'm fed up of the same bullshit story of Tamil cinema...The movie stars..not a fan of all of them...I don't want to watch heroes with makeup and wigs or 50 yr old college students.
Heroes who are above 50 or who look like they need to get a life are:


1.Vijaykanth

He is supposed to be the hero of my generation...Nobody looks or dresses like him anymore...He is way out of his mind to torture us with his movie releases....He is extremely huge with the worst kind of dancing.I really wonder why they always bring his eyes in close-up!!The 'captain' is how he's referred to us, who is always on the run to catch terrorists..His weapons
1.killer looks
2.Long boring dialogues
3.Smell of his hair dye

This is our great HERO without any makeup!!!Duh!!!now i know he is wearing a wig too!!

2.Rajnikanth

Now..i really enjoyed his style when i was young...but after so many years....I'm bored!!!It's hard to see him with no wigs,no foundation and lipstick....tats how he makes his public appearances!!Dude!!you are old..

3.Raj kiran

He is the macho man of Tamil cinema with a very hard muscular structure and the heart of a 2 year old...we don't take crap like that anymore...He is portrayed as a villager with lungi above the knee showing his underpants or those striped trousers(assets of Tamil movies!!)).His thighs are exposed more to us than the heroines.Since he is shown to us as a strong hero...they always show him either hogging on large amounts of food

Or hitting people so hard that they go flying miles away from him!!!Nothing can do anything to him.....not even radio active biological weapons....

4.T.Rajendran
Widely known as "TR".He is different from the other heroes....he never touches any of his heroines...not even for the duet songs and uses a lot of sister sentiments!!!Famous for his rhyming dialogues..(plz!!!!)..His crappy love dialogues makes the movie a big flop..I have no words!!!!he is making me speechless...




5.Prabhu
HAHAHAHAHEHEHEHEHHOOOO...
Where do they design costumes for this guy???

Thank god!!!!The upcoming actors are better...

18.pimples!!!

It's all supposed to be related to hormones...Not fair...I guess pimples have their own mind and pop out when
1.you have your class photo taken.
2.Passport size photo taken.
3.When you are with the hottest guy (according to u).
4.On your wedding.
These pimples have the tendency to appear in places where you would never dream of...Like on the tip of your nose.It is so awkward when someone is staring at your pimple while talking to you..I once banged my head on the door (while i had pimples!!)..It was like as if someone shot me in the head...I HATE them!!!

17.Waiting anywhere!!

In life,you are always waiting for something...Waiting rooms in hospitals give me the creeps.I just hate going to a hospital....I get so anxious,nervous,agitated...I remember going to a bank with token systems...I had 400 people waiting before me..Waiting in long queues to pay the college fees,in airports,in supermarkets.We have to wait everywhere...In India,nothing comes on time,You have to wait for hours in a railway station,bus stand,airports etc.Even to get your mark sheets (though...I'm not eager to get them!!!).There are about 85 students in my class...and i have to wait for my marks...like for an hr or something...When i went for my first interview,I had to wait for 2 hrs...What really is messed up here are traffic jams...Even when you call someone...you get CALL WAITING..we are wasting a huge amount of time by waiting...I think we should put it to proper use like:
1.Plan to kill the one who is making you wait
2Call someone and exaggerate about how you are waiting for someone in your busy schedule.(tat would be a lie for sure!!!)
3.Play with your mobile and check out the games that you have never played.
4.Read all the messages you have got.
5.If their are kids near you..make weird faces till they cry...
6.Secretly rate everyone around you..
7.Stare at people.

16.Nerds after an exam...

You sit in an examination hall for 3 hrs putting all the effort into acting like you know the answers.You keep on staring at the answer sheet thinking about how you can fill it up with real good "could-be" answers.Finally...when it's all over and everybody is giving up their paper..and you are thinking about how to enjoy your holidays...Tats when these "after xam" Nerds break into your dreams brutally hurting you with''"Hey!! do you know the answer to the 12th question..It was out of syllabus....but i learned it...you knw...just to be safe...."or...They would cry to you about the two mark question they missed or...how they forgot to UNDERLINE a topic..while we have a big question about passing the exam.Rolling our eyes...rude replies...nothing keeps them away...They would also make us feel crappy with comments like "oh!!!I'm so happy....the paper turned out to be much more easier than any other paper in 10 years...."They bring in calculators to calculate their marks and percentages...while i just want to do simple multiplication....Or some geeks even lie that they didn't do the paper well....(you know the myth...Those who say they didn't do well get to score 100!!!).To all those ppl..."Get a life!!!"

15.Monday Blues.

MoAndays...After a busy weekend,you are tired,lazy.You are just begging god for rain,a broken bridge or some thing to happen so you can just sleep on your warm cozy bed watching Tv without your boss bugging you and your colleagues nagging you.You have the day to yourself...TIRED of doing nothing..wow..it sounds like heaven..It's hard for the mind as well as your body to stop relaxing...Coz your robotic life is reality. and you dont want to get real.You get this wierd crappy feeling on Sunday evenings itself.The staffs in my college are heartless.They give you a lot of assignments over the weekend and want it submitted on a Monday...The summer vacation are also spoiled by loads of shitty assignments...I hate this crappy mechanical life...which i know,will never end!!

14.Dirty Sink

Sometimes, the maid is on leave and you get to do the dishes....Holy Shit!!!The sink is always filled with filthy things.I wonder how she would do this for a living!!They look like toxic waste and the smell...hmmmm...Don't want to talk about it!!!It looks more of a dump then a sink...esp if you haven't cleaned it for more than 2 days (awww.. false hope that my maid will be back!!!).I keep on reassuring myself that these dishes contain yesterday's meal...However, the acrid smell keeps on discouraging me.As soon as my family members know it's my turn (to do the dishes),they search the whole house for coffee cups,coke glasses,jars...anything that needs washing...They keep on piling it till your hands wrinkle and smell of dish-washing liquid!!!

13.Mehendhi

Mehendhi or henna...I know all girls love it and blah...blah...But after2-3 days,when the design starts to fade...That's when the problem arises.Our hands look so dirty as if it has been infected with deadly micro-organisms.I also hate the fact, that beauty parlours charge a lot for this....I would rather have clean hands free of charge...

12.Waking up early...

I hate waking up in the morning...Why can't we have schools,colleges,offices working after 12:00 noon??When the alarm goes off,I just want to switch it off and go back to sleep...My mom's kicking is giving me a hard time to continue sleeping.Some people take waking others up to an extra level by
1.Turning OFF the Air Conditioner or fan.
2.Tickling your nose with the corner of your blanket.
3.Making sure that there is a fly in your room (more annoying than humans).But i do wonder,why they sit on our nose all the time???
4.Lying to you that you have got a call from your boss.
5.Throwing pillows on your face and pulling your blanket away.
6.Sprinkle water(i think so??) on your face.
7.Yelling,screaming,laughing loudly (an attempt to make you deaf)
8.Grab the end of the blanket and pull you down to the floor.
9.DOGS...licking your face is a big wake up call.
10.If all fails...i guess that's when the kicking starts...

It's not written in any religious books...but whoever is reading this and smiling....You are doing a big sin!!!You never give-up...do you???

11.Men pissing

I'm sick and tired of seeing men pissing everywhere.It gets me on my nerve because they are least bothered about us.They actually imagine a virtual toilet around them.Among the standing and sitting pissers were some who even check out how well they piss by displaying their genitals to us.I just can't deal with the fact that they do this in front of homes.What do they expect from us...I can't even interrupt him..whats the use???..Maybe i should get blinders or something!!!

10.Mosquitoes!!help!!!

The first thing i noticed on coming to India are the mosquitoes.The number of them here is larger than our population.I itch all day with lumps everywhere.I 'm beginning to resemble Michael Chiklis in Fantastic Four.


They can bite through anything.I have tried everything from odomos (stinks like skunk),Coils (suffocate to death),Mosquito Electric Bat (successful on hitting myself).They are active mostly on a power-cut night buzzing in your ear.You get so tired of it that you let them bite you.I have turned into a mosquito hunter and a sadist.
1.I search for them
2.kill them
3. laugh over it!!!
4.Repeat step 1

9.Hairy men

I'm talking about men who have it everywhere..even their ears..Imagine after having foreplay,we have to spit out the furball...Too much to handle..I have seen Sathyaraj,anil kapoor (Indian heroes)..Men have wrong notions about masculinity and hair...Blve me guys...

8.Boring meetingzzzzzzzzzz

I’m just allergic to lectures,advices and meetings….It's a mission impossible task of

1.trying to look at the time in your watch without raising any doubts.

2.Thinking about what’s for lunch and acting as if the lecture is an eye opener.

3.sleeping with your eyes open.

4.Acting like you are taking notes while you draw the lecturer.

5.Having eye contact with your new crush without blushing.

7.People who tend to eat chocos like this!!!

I have seen it in ads,movies,posters,websites….I personally think that eating chocolate bars like a retard is not sexy at all!!!!

6. Meeting your relatives

I’m not a reclusive person but the fact remains you don’t need a specific reason like a birthday or a festival to meet relatives in India. They are there everyday…everywhere…The most complicated part of this would be to remember who and how they are related to you. The biggest risk you would want to do is have a chat with them which is like an informal interview.There are some, who advice you on what to do with YOUR life…and remind you of how unsuccessful you have been,a recent death in the family,secret love affair and anything that you would never want to discuss .If you ever react to this bull shit then you are having an attitude problem…WTF??They are highly dangerous people with skill sets like backbiting,gossiping who are absent from your life at times of need.Money sucking parasites!!!

5.Frogs...

No offense to frog owners….I just can’t imagine watching this thing in close-up. This creature is so mixed up with life. Disgusting, gross and slimy with eyeballs protruding out in a repulsive way. When it’s raining and you are thinking (or forced to) about your lover and you hear a ribit ribit ribit…I’m in no mood for romance .It has been the biggest turn-off for me ( apart from my boyfriend’s stinky socks).She kissed the frog prince …for a handsome dude…desperate I guess!!!

4.The only Mug Bug taking notes.

Warning you…Please stay away from these nerd balls….While the whole class is busy chatting,playing,laughing,singing,eating,flirting,sleeping,yawning and doing something irrelevant to the class. These inept pillars not only take notes but also ask doubts to the lecturer insulting the entire class. Though, they prove to be a highly annoying , I don’t mind them in my class…..(they are the only way I can pass my exams).

3.These huge Headphones

What can I say about these huge Godzilla phones. I feel as if two speakers were tied forcefully onto my ear. I wouldn’t wanteven my enemies to experience this shit…I would gift it to people who watch TV serials so loud that you could hear it a few blocks away. The only reason,Indians would buy it is because of it’s size….What goes on in their mind while buying is the fact that they are getting these huge headphones for a cheap rate (The bigger the better)....i don’t want to leave out the huge mic attached to it that’s comes on your face….Total shit!!!

2. Hate the way sex is always portrayed in Indian movies

There is a lot of exposure to the word “sex”.You have loads of magazines, websites where adult content is the only content.Yet,sex in Indian movies are portrayed like the above picture. We thank a few stars like imraan haashim, mallika sherawat, Kamal Hassan, who work their sweat out.Whats the use…One is called a serial kisser and the other a womanizer.Crap!!!Bull shit!!!They still try to make sex sound mysterious….Get a life guys…I have had times when we watch a movie with the whole family. The moment there is a romantic scene, these things follow:

1. I just go get something from the fridge or just walk out of the room.(or)

2.Someone changes the channel.(or)

3.My Uncle would stand in front of the TV, trying to search something.

But...if this scene would pop up unanticipated….Then, everyone in the room would freeze as if we were attacked by aliens (Except my parents).My parents would just check our reactions to these scenes. Believe me, it’s been hard NOT to break a smile.

1. Kids who are too intellectual for their age.

I just can’t see the obsession of parents, who tend to think they have “E=mc2” kids. They talk, walk, think like adults. The funny part is when parents force their so called friends to listen to all those crappy rhymes that their children learn in school. 98% of children, below the age of 7 yrs would want to be doctors. Though, I'm amazed by their intelligence,I pity the state of these kids.

Welcome!!

I read an interesting blog last night and wondered why i shouldn't blog about what i hate...